Starter Wives

Posted on 24. May, 2007 by John Roblinsky in Cougars Defined, Cougars Everywhere

If you saw The Tonight Show with Jay Leno last night, I know you drooled a bit when Debra Messing (age 38) came out.  I can only imagine her titties lathered in Elmer’s glue to keep her extremely revealing dress on.  Even Jay was stuttering on his first few lines of their interview.  Shwwing!

Debra was on Jay’s show to promote her new mini-series The Starter Wife on USA.  While I will certainly never watch an episode of the show and I’m not a Debra Messing fan,  the term “starter wife” intrigued me so I went to the show’s website to check it out.

Molly Kagan, 41 (Debra Messing) is a successful housewife married to a rising movie executive until he divorces her because he’s a jackass or whatever.  “[Molly] gets shunned by other Wives Of including one of her best friends, and worst of all, she discovers her ex is dating a pop tartlet who is half his age.”  After that Molly probably cries a lot about how her life is so hard and finally, “discovers that it’s up to her to be the architect of her new life and decide what she wants to make of it.”

I could go on and on about how ridiculous this show is, but since I don’t live in Malibu or make seven figures, there’s no way for me to understand the struggles that a rich divorcee goes through.

Back to the point I’m making: A woman turned Starter Wife (you become a starter wife once you’re divorced) is also a woman turned COUGAR!  I know this show will never have the balls to show Molly welcome her new independence by ravaging an innocent 20-something to match her ex-husband dating the “pop tartlet who is half his age,” but we can dream.

How you work a Starter Wife Cougar: According to the show she’ll be a “social pariah” lingering on the outskirts of the group.  The game to play here is the nuturing hunter.  This injured, former zoo cougar just wants someone to listen to her.  When the other cougs in the bar see you taking care of her, they too will want that emotional attention and will come after you.  Those are the cougs you really want, the starter wife is just bait!

UPDATE: Finally got the photo of Messing in that revealing dress…after the jump…

Also, Debra Messing is a freakin cougar fo’ sho.

Oh and the nail in the coffin for “The Starter Wife” being a terrible show, their tagline: “Because, after all, Wife Goes On.”

Tags: starter wife, tv, usa